Al-Fatihah

It is with great sadness and heavy hearts that I write to inform you that Papa left us yesterday afternoon at 1:27pm. InsyaAllah, he is in a better place.

After a week in the ICU and so many conflicting messages from the multiple doctors treating him, we finally decided to bring him home. It was a very hard decision for us, but I think it was the right decision to do. 

Just as a slight recap (for the benefit of Aiden and Ian who will be reading this when they are older), the doctor performed a brain EEG on Friday afternoon. The results showed that there was no brain activity. However, the doctor couldn't say for sure whether the results were due to the sedatives he was given a few days before the test, or because he was no longer with us. There was a chance that the sedatives were keeping him in deep sleep because his kidney wasn't performing well. But because of his age, the doctor gave a 90/10 chance that we would not survive; but he also suggested for us to give Papa a chance until at least Monday. 

Clinging to any chance of hope, the siblings suggested for a dialysis to purge Papa's system off the sedatives, so we can know for sure. Kalau tidak, takut ralat and menyesal. 

It was a slow 24 hours dialysis in two blocks of 12 hours. Started at ~10pm on Friday night and scheduled to end on Saturday night. However, that Saturday afternoon, Papa opened his eyes briefly, although his eyes weren't focusing and he was staring into space. Everyone rushed in to mintak ampun maaf. We were so happy, as we thought the dialysis was working and that Papa was coming out of his sleep. 

It turned out to be just a brief moment of joy for us. Saturday night a few hours before his dialysis was due to end, the doctor called for an emergency meeting. Apparently, his BP was dropping, heart was declining and reliance to ventilator was climbing. The doctor wasn't sure whether he would last until Monday. The girls started crying while the boys looked stunned. Collectively as a family, we decided to bring him home the next day. 

The next day we arrived at the hospital and had a last meeting with another doctor. This doctor reaffirmed our decision, as he confirmed that Papa was now relying 100% of life support oxygen and that his lungs dah bengkak. An ambulance was arranged, and we finally brought him home.

Alhamdulillah, it was a swift and peaceful ending. All his wives and kids were surrounding him on the bed, while the nurse removed his life support tube. I was holding on to his left hand when the tube was removed; during the procedure he opened his eyes and he actually pulled his hand back. Allah jer yang tahu betapa sakitnya that was for him. I started crying buckets right after that. We had prepared a standby oxygen tank for him but we didn't need it after all. Just less than 10 minutes after that, he took his last breath. I still remember watching him take his last 3 breathes; during the last breath he slowly closed his eyes and we all knew that he had left us for eternity. 

Hubby joined my stepbrothers untuk mandikan, kapan and solat jenazah. Alhamdulillah, Allah made everything easy for us and Papa selamat dikebumikan selepas Asar semalam. Bernama, Malaysiakini, The Sun Daily, Sinar Harian, NTV9, Astro Awani and Astro radios also covered his demise; you can read about it here: 

Former Tambun MP Yahaya Shafie dies https://m.malaysiakini.com/news/373819

Again, if it is not too much to ask from my readers, may I ask that you recite a prayer for my Papa. Sedekahkan Al-Fatihah and doakan that rohnya ditempatkan dengan orang-orang yang soleh dan beriman. Ampunkan dosanya, lapangkan kuburnya dan jauhinya daripada azab kubur. 

To those yang tak putus-putus mendoakan for him since my last blogpost, from the bottom of my heart - thank you. To those who took the time to offer your condolences to the family by Facebook, Whatsapp, IG messages and such, thank you for grieving with us. Your sincere condolences have warmed our hearts during this period of grief and sorrow. 

Prayers Requested

I am finally back from my extended business trips. The kids had fun at Sentosa Island, Singapore while I attended meetings. I then had a whirlwind repacking frenzy - less than 12 hours back home to drop the kids, unpack, swap luggage and repack, and then Hubby and I left for Incredible India where we spent a couple of days touring Delhi and Agra before I started my string of conferences.

While we were in India, we received news that my dad was down with the common flu and cough. What was worrying was the fact that he fell down. Despite our insistence that we bring him to the hospital, he declined. I don't know how the siblings managed to coax him, but eventually they went to the hospital where he received nebulizer treatment for his persistent cough and phlegm in his lungs. ECG was done but found to be normal and he was allowed to go home. 

Unfortunately he fell down again at home, a few hours after they left the hospital. This time, no one realized that he had fell and they only found him during Subuh. He barely had the energy to pull himself up, so collectively the siblings decided to admit him to the hospital for one night. He had a fever, high BP and his lungs were congested that the doctors were worried that he might have developed an infection. Closer to the afternoon, he started talking nonsense and didn't make sense. Everyone thought it was because the medication was so strong and he was groggy. 

Mind you, when all this happened, I had just sent Hubby to the Delhi airport for his journey home and I was busy preparing for my conferences in Delhi and Mumbai. I barely had time to look at my phone. 

As the days went on, my dad's condition continued to decline. He couldn't pass urine, his lungs were congested and his speech was still slurred. But he was able to move his hands and leg normally and he had a good appetite. 

Finally, I arrived home on Friday morning. Papa's condition was still the same. They did an echo but found that his heart was fine, and there were even talks about discharging him right after his lungs cleared. After discussing with Hubby, we decided to make a trip home to Ipoh for the weekend, to visit both Papa and the new baby (I had a new nephew while in India). 

We arrived at the hospital on Saturday afternoon. He looked absolutely fine except for his speech (macam lidah pendek, so I couldn't make out what he was trying to say), the occasional nebulizer treatments for his lungs and a slightly elevated BP. He kept indicating that he wanted to go home. I guess he had enough of the hospital already. 

We left the hospital late afternoon to check in to our hotel. I promised him that I would come again at night, and he nodded to indicate that he understood.

Well, everything spiraled downwards right after that. He complained of chest pain, his oxygen level declined, high BP. Drastic change, so the hospital decided to move him to the High Dependency Unit (HDU). They did an MRI on him and found a small blood clot in his brain. Due to that, they suspected that he had a mild stroke. During the night, his heart rate spiked and he developed AF (irregular heart beat) so they gave him medication to prevent the risk of stroke.

The next day he was struggling to breathe, so the hospital moved him to ICU. His body was weakening and the doctors suspected that it was because of the lung infection. We rushed to see him that morning, and he looked so sickly. He was struggling to breathe, gasping for air and wearing an oxygen mask. They gave him some relaxants so he was asleep when we came in. In the afternoon visiting hours, he heard us and opened his eyes. He tried to remove the wires on his body and indicated with his hands that he wanted to leave! We tried to calm him down and coaxed him to sleep. That night, since his oxygen levels were so low the doctors decided to put him on life support. 

The next day (Monday) he was still on life support with no improvements. Monday night, the doctors told us that he was in critical stage, and asked us to sign a DIL notice. DIL stands for Death In Line, meaning the condition is very serious and can lead to death. The doctors asked us to prepare for the worst. As of today, there is still no change in his condition.

I've never been close to my dad as I practically grew up without him in my life. But still, it hurts to see him in so much pain. If it is not too much to ask from my readers, can I ask that you extend a prayer for my Papa. If the best is for him to recover, then pray for him to get better soon. However, if it is time for him to go, then make it quick, easy and painless for him. Let him go dengan tenang, mudah dan selesa.

Thanking you in advance, for your sincere prayers.

Much love,

Liz

Three Generations

It's exactly a week after my birthday!

It was certainly a wonderful week of celebrations. I was celebrated a grand total of four times; with my dad and my extended family, with Ian at his birthday party, with my SPK girls and last but not least, an intimate dinner with my better half. So blessed to turn a year older in the company of my fantastic family and friends... but as much as I love being celebrated, I don't think I can stomach more cake!

Anyway, this post is dedicated to my birthday celebration with my dad, my stepmothers and step siblings. A week before the actual birth date, my dad had lamented quite sadly about how his children were too busy to balik Ipoh to celebrate his birthday. Little did he know that we had planned for a surprise party in KL. We went to great lengths to keep it a secret from him, and it was certainly impressive to see how all the siblings rallied together to organize the party. One was in charge of bringing him to KL, one for smuggling a tuxedo into his suitcase, another for booking the hotel, one for balloons and decorations, and yours truly for the birthday cake.

So that fateful night (3 days before the actual birth date, mind you!) we all gathered at my dad's hotel. Meanwhile, my father thought he was going out for dinner with my stepbrother. Unfortunately, he wanted to leave the hotel for dinner right after Maghrib hence my stepbrother had to tell a number of white lies to stall him. (Hujan lebat, KL banjir, kereta tak boleh jalan, bla bla bla oh my poor brother *giggles*) My dad got quite agitated and cranky at having to wait.

Aiden and I posed for photos while Ian, the other birthday boy, was fast asleep.

Us sitting in the darkened private room, waiting for the guest of honour to arrive.

By the time everyone arrived, my dad had waited for nearly an hour in his hotel room. We finally gave the go ahead for my stepbrother to bring my dad down to the private room where we were all waiting. We all sat quietly in the darkened room and watched anxiously as he finally arrived... Our plan was nearly busted as some of the hotel staff gleefully wished him a Happy Birthday as he walked past. As soon as he walked in, we all yelled "Surprise!!!" The look on his face? Priceless!

My big fat happy family.

Waiting for food to arrive.

Ian woke up and refused to put on his bow tie.

We had a fantabulous four course meal that night. Well at the very least, my lamb was good but Hubby's steak was tough.

Caesar salad (Aiden complained that Ian did number 2, but actually it was the tangy smell of the dressing) and mushroom soup.

Roast lamb, and apple pie with ice-cream for dessert.

Mat Melayu had nasi goreng kampung.

Ian playing with helium balloons while we were feasting on our dinner.

Birthday girl and boy.

Three generations share the same birth date! Yes, in case you missed it in all my previous posts, my Dad, Ian and I share the same birthday.

Then, cake cutting session! I chose my favourite cake for my Dad - Salted Caramel cake from One Serambi. As for myself, I made my own Red Velvet cake. (Birthday sendiri pun kena bake birthday cake sendiri!!!) Absolutely love the personalized cake topper from Akudankraft. It made my simple cake look so professional!

The cakes.

Ian, you will never be able to blow the candle out with pursed lips!

We struggled to get everyone into the frame!

After cake, we all played a game. We were all given a piece of paper with several questions to test how well we knew our Papa. It was an absolutely hilarious session, not only because our answers were wacky (favourite song - Madu Tiga) but because my Dad's answers didn't make sense too (favourite food - lamb shank, when nearly everyone knew how often he requests to have KFC)!

Last but not least, what dinner would be complete without a thank you speech?

Thank you speech from my dad.

Family photo.

A photo with my better half.

Thank you siblings, for the great birthday celebration! Now stay tuned, for Part 2 of my birthday week - Ian's birthday party!

Farewell May

I know, I know. I've been rather quiet in May. April was quiet due to the preparation for Aiden and Ian's birthday. So what's my excuse for May?

Truthfully, I've been busy with work. With the kick off of the first offshore campaign just a week ago, I've been busy firefighting last minute issues left right and center. I've even succumbed to synchronizing and pushing my work emails to my personal phone (which I suspect is the reason for the iPhone crash) because at this critical point of the project, people just can't wait overnight for an email response. Not only that, I'm due to mobilize for the second offshore campaign soon too. With the way things are progressing, hopefully I'll get Ramadhan onshore but will probably be spending the bulk of Syawal month offshore! *cries*

So other than the phone wipe-out, here are the highlights of May:

• My eldest brother visited from US. He had a pleasant surprise for us (biarlah rahsia dulu) and in return we treated him to Fatty Crab and durians. It's been quite a while since the whole family gathered, so of course we couldn't resist taking a sibling photo.

• A fellow gang pagar sekolah invited us for her daughter's wedding. We enjoyed the event very much, but the kids enjoyed it even more. They literally took over the photo booth. Here are some hilarious snapshots of the boys (and us!) posing.

• Ian absolutely loves Angry Birds, so I took the boys out for the Angry Birds movie. I went in with extremely low expectations, expecting to just act as chaperon, playing with my phone to kill time. But surprisingly, I enjoyed myself! Believable plot and smart humor. Now I understand why the birds are so angry with the pigs! Ian sat engrossed in his seat for the entire two hours, and as the credits rolled he asked, "ann mowe tyme??" (One more time?) *giggles*

• Last but certainly not least, the SPK gang had our last dinner out before Ramadhan. We chose to have buffet at Makan Kitchen, Doubletree by Hilton. It was also Ayu's birthday and yours truly was tasked with finding her a present. I scratched out branded toiletries and an Arzu scarf before finally deciding on a Chanel lip gloss. Here is a photo of Aiden and Ian making themselves at home at the Chanel cosmetics counter, and some photos from the night.

Here's to welcoming June!

Cerita Raya!

Phewww... finally after days of wading through hundreds of work emails, unpacking our balik kampung luggages, attending my step grandmother's funeral *Al-Fatihah* and stressing about the Friso Gold media launch, now everything is done and dusted! I do have a birthday cake to bake, a dessert table to prepare and 5 open houses to attend this weekend, but let's pretend that this weekend is eons away so I can write peacefully about our Eid celebrations this year. *sigh*

Anyway, since this year is Hubby's turn, we spent the final night of Ramadhan and pagi Syawal at his dad's kampung in Teluk Intan. However, the beauty of marrying someone who's kampung is so close to yours, is that somehow you can manage to visit both kampungs on the first day of Hari Raya. And we did exactly that! After Asar we immediately left Teluk Intan and drove to Ipoh to visit my Dad. Hence every year, no one fights about which kampung we want to go back to. Win-win situation kan?

So in Teluk Intan this year, my FIL was relieved of his duty of making his infamous rendang ayam. Instead, my MIL decided to show off her cooking skills and made a particular rendang made from various organs. *uurrrggghhh* I am really no big fan of hati, limpa and the likes. I can only tolerate paru (cow lungs), and even then only when it is deep fried. Hence I stayed away from the kitchen while they were busy cutting the organs up, *eeewww* and only came back when it was time to cut the greens.

But the boys sure had fun in their kampung. They played all day long, not even pausing to eat. The night before Eid, I called it quits at about ten-ish and forced Aiden to go to bed with me. Ian on the other hand refused to listen to instructions so I left him to it. The next morning, I was told that Ian was still roaming the kitchen at one in the morning and even gave the ladies a hand with the rendang!

Ian busy roaming the house, while all of us slept camping style in the living hall.

Aiden with his uncles! Yes - uncles!!

Morning of Eid, we discovered that we had run the taps dry. I guess the pipes must be really darn old and just couldn't cope with the high occupancy usage that day. Good thing my in-laws were staying in a nearby hotel, so while Hubby went for Eid prayers, I drove the kids and my sister in laws to the hotel to shower. Unfortunately, I had to make two trips back to the house as I forgot my towel-lah, my baju raya-lah... and nearly got lost in Teluk Intan town trying to retrace my drive back... macam macam! Ian on the other hand was super cranky, which is really unlike him. He's usually a very cheerful baby. Tuh la, orang suruh tido awak sibuk nak merayau dalam rumah!

Hubby's grandmother (also Aiden's great grandmother) sportingly donned a pair of sunglasses for the salam raya ritual.

Spot me if you can!

It was no easy feat trying to get the three boys to look at the camera and smile simultaneously!

Well at least Aiden can do selfies now.

Yeay for Teluk Intan!

Last but certainly not least, how can one wearing royal blue resist taking pictures to match the Barisan Nasional emblem, proudly displayed at the porch? No prizes for guessing which political party Hubby's grandmother supports! *grin*

After Asar prayers, we made our way to Ipoh. Called my dad to find out where he was. Found out that he was at my third stepmother's house, famous for their udang galah rendang pedas. Sure enough, not only were we served udang galah, my stepmother packed some for me to bring home too! My father on the other hand, had already changed out of his baju melayu and was already in his official outfit - the bush jacket! After a very hearty meal, we took an impromptu family photo with my dad, then headed to my fourth stepmother's house, where we were spending the night.

Finally, everyone looked at the camera!

Unplanned fifty shades of blue. Oh, and my siblings are simply the best! They actually changed into their raya clothes just to take photos with us before we all called it a night.

The next day, one of Hubby's friend called to inform us that he was coming with his family to beraya. Kelam kabut mandi!!! Thank goodness my stepmother is one fine cook, she managed to prepare soto for our guests in under one hour! Then afterwards, someone sent over se-besen durian, and I had a field time eating durian. Frankly, I do not quite like those expensive D-26 or Musang King. I think they have too much flesh and a tad too creamy. Durian kampung on the other hand, is small but oh so satisfying.

Twins! Ian playing with the humongous mirror in the dining hall.

Ian peering curiously at the durian.

I told you it was se-besen durian! Super yummy!

So that was how we spent our first few days of Syawal. Stay tuned for my next post, where we continued our Syawal journey to Kuantan! To a dusun durian too!

Turning 32 in Emerald Green

A continuation of my last post...

After the very tummy-satisfying trip to Penang, we continued my birthday adventure in Ipoh. It was a quadruple celebration; my brother's wedding, my Papa's 80th birthday, Ian's first birthday, and not to forget - yours truly's birthday lahhhh...

The theme was emerald green and it was no easy feat trying to get everyone to match. This time around, Hubby refused to make a new baju melayu - he wanted to recycle an existing baju melayu that has been hanging in our closet for the last 7 years. *sigh* Which meant that I had to literally run around town with his baju melayu in hand, to look for baju melayu for the two kids and a ready made baju kurung for myself in the exact same shade! Do you know how many shades of emerald green available out there??? I was lucky I found one shop in Jalan TAR that sold baju melayu for the two kiddos in a similar shade. Next was getting my outfit to match. After weeks and weeks of walking in various shopping malls, I found one outfit in exactly the same green as Hubby, in Saidatulnisa. Lesson learnt - next time just buy a similar material and send it to the tailor for peace of mind. Or - get my outfit ready first then insist that Hubby and the kids match my colour instead! 

The wedding was held at Casuarina Ipoh at Meru. New hotel, and just a stone's throw away from my stepmother's house. Meru is certainly an upcoming area in Ipoh! We walked into the hotel and was greeted by a life-sized standee picture of my brother and his new wife, right smack by the check-in counter. *grin* 

Modern design room.

The build-in hairdryer in the bathroom certainly came in handy that night. 

The ballroom was beautifully decorated for the wedding. I especially liked the elevated walkway towards the dias and how they decorated it in white. There's something so enchanting about the colour white... it's a timeless color and it has such a pure feeling to it.

The beginning of the elevated walkway. Breathtakingly beautiful - decorated with lanterns and white flowers.

The dias in the background, complemented with white drapes.

After choosing our seats, we got to work with greeting the guests at the entrance of the ballroom.

Aiden was nowhere to be found.

But then again, he always manages to appear in group photos! Here are the ladies in my family. See how my shade of green differs from the rest?

The wedding kicked off and Aiden kept himself busy munching on chocolates.

While the crowd was busy watching the bride and groom, we were busy taking selfies! 

Aiden and Ian were both happy and smiling that night.

Aiden is usually super scared of my Papa. I think it is because he sees him only once in a blue moon. Doesn't help that Hubby's dad (Aiden's datuk) pampers Aiden all the time - which is something my Papa doesn't do. But this time around, Aiden actually wanted to take photos with his "kampung datuk", and even gave him a hug (picture further below). Hubby and I were pleasantly surprised!

Can you believe my dad is 80??!!

Halfway through the wedding dinner, Aiden was asked to change into his next outfit. Yup - Aiden was going to escort the flower girl and walk together with the bride and groom down the aisle for cake cutting. As always, Aiden loves being in the limelight so he raced back to our room to change into his tuxedo. He also requested for Daddy to style his hair with some hair gel *huwaaa I am going to cryyyyy, Aiden has grown so muchhhh* and after inspecting himself in the mirror - he insisted that no one touch his impeccably styled hair!

Posing proudly.

Handsome Aiden posing with his partner, pretty Azalea.

Of course, Ian had to change into a similar tuxedo too (a hand me down suit from Aiden!), and he looked like such a gentleman here, holding Arissa's back. (Actually, he was using Arissa as support for him to stand *laughs*)

On the left - Aiden looking super proud in his crisp tuxedo. On the right - Aiden looking slightly pissed that he had to pose so many times because his baby brother wasn't cooperating!

I bought a red bow for Aiden to complement the red handkerchief at the tuxedo's breast pocket, not knowing that the men entourage would also don black tuxedos with red neckties. It was perfect, because Aiden matched them beautifully!

Aiden was smiling and posing for pictures throughout the walk down the aisle. I could tell that he was definitely enjoying all the attention given to him.

Smiling as he walked into the ballroom.

Smiling at any cameras trained towards him!

Aiden and Azalea leading the entourage.

Still smiling!

After the cake cutting ceremony, all of Papa's children including their other halves and kids, went up the stage to sing for him. We sang "Lagenda" - the words really impacted my Papa as he was seen wiping tears as he watched us sing. After the song, Papa was invited onstage to give a speech to commemorate his 80th birthday. It was 9 pages in total! I could barely feel my feet by the end of the speech. Hubby was holding Ian who promptly fell asleep in his arms, and poor Hubby had to carry a sleeping 10kg Ian throughout the longgggg speech.

Group selfie just before we went on stage.

Papa and his very long (but entertaining!) speech. He even cracked a joke about having 5 wives, two being deceased hence he had one more slot available. *erkkk*

Aiden hugging my Papa. So sweet!

Selfie with the two kiddos.

Aiden receiving a peck on the cheek for a job well done.

After the wedding ceremony was over, Hubby and I took the opportunity to close the night with a small cake cutting session for Ian. I didn't even bother baking the cake, I simply ordered the cake from KL and carried it on my lap all the way to Ipoh. Truth be told, when I saw the cake - it was love at first sight and I knew that I simply wanted it for Ian. The cake was made in a shape of an adorable giraffe, with a hat and a tie - I mean, how much cuter can the cake get??!!

Hubby posing with the cake.

Check out that priceless grin when Ian saw his birthday cake! I actually had to block his hand from whacking the giraffe's hat!

Super super cute.

Close ups of the giraffe - with eyelashes to die for!

Love this picture of my dad staring at the giraffe. He was probably thinking back to his birthday cake when he was a year old! *grin*

Singing the birthday song for Ian.

Ooppss we forgot to light the candle.

The three generations blowing out the single candle, Aiden included!

Check out Ian's expression, while looking at my dad: "Who are you and what are you doing with my cake?"

Thumbs up from Aiden!

A kiss on the cheek for the birthday boy.

Finally, we let Ian loose with the cake. And the first thing he did was pull the giraffe's ear off and munched on it!

Ian insisted that Daddy have a taste of the yummy giraffe's ear!

Happy birthday to Ian and me!

Last free-style family photo for the night.

Sisters - from three different mothers!

Ian enjoying his birthday cake.

Aiden came up to me and said "Mummy, this flower is especially for you". I melted and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

Back in the room, we tried very hard to get the two boys to sit down together for photos. Can you see Ian wheezing around the room?

Best picture we could get that night!